12 December 2023
How to deal with childhood fears
Reading time: 2′
Fear is an emotion that arises when our body feels threatened by some event and is a natural reaction.
Our body’s reaction is normal, unconscious and protective. The symptoms, but mainly the treatment method, are different from nightmares, phobias and night terrors.
As children grow older and acquire more experiences, they begin to fear and avoid certain situations. Usually, young children are afraid of the dark, loud sounds, voices and sudden-threatening movements but after proper management and care they understand the incident.They expect their parents to embrace them, to offer them security, peace and tranquility. As they also expect their loved ones to show empathy and then explain to them what happened in a logical and non-exaggerating way.
Fears have nothing to do with phobias, which are obvious and persistent fears and need special help to deal with them. That’s why it’s important for parents to be able to distinguish when a child is just scared and needs hugs and attention, and when they’ve developed a phobia.If children persist in fearing an event they should have rationalized, and when confronted with it they sweat, panic, and feel like they’re going to pass out, then those children are experiencing a phobia and need to be treated differently.
But if the children run to you to complain and when you talk to them, they calm down and forget the incident that scared them, then it is simply a fear, which can be easily fought by you.
Let's see in detail what parents can do in such cases:
To begin with, it makes sense that there are things that you fear too. But you must try to control your emotions and your reactions as much as you can and not pass your own fear on to the children.
When something happens that has scared them, don’t make it big and keep your cool. Otherwise, there will be more panic.
No matter how absurd the children’s fears seem to you, do not laugh or make fun of them, under no circumstances. Support them with understanding and calmness.
Don’t try to force them to face their fear in a violent or adult way, and don’t under any circumstances force them to overcome what they feel in your own way. From you they need the strength to find the courage to face their fear in their own way.
Don’t use fear as a threat to get something you want. The more you use fear as a tool to blackmail them into doing what you want them to do (eg to keep their sleep schedule or eat their food, etc.) the more the fear will overwhelm them and they will not be able to handle it.
Don’t forget that in order to create strong adults, you need to create confident children. And confidence is built with trust, love and positive reinforcement. Do not stop encouraging them to face their fears, to be courageous like the heroes of fairy tales and to believe in their strengths.
And slowly the fear will be defeated!