Emotion Coahing: Why we hesitate to change our parenting methods?

Let’s discuss some typical concerns parents may have about their children’s emotional expressions using Dr. Markham’s work:

• “What if my child is overly dramatic?” Children have intense emotional experiences, therefore anything that an adult may consider little can seem like the end of the world to them. Children feel more understood and supported when their feelings are acknowledged rather than discounted. It teaches kids that all feelings, including those that seem inflated to adults, are real and significant.
• “What happens if my kid is acting upset?” A child who pretends to cry is usually in need of comfort. They can get the emotional stability they need if you respond to them compassionately, as opposed to discounting their feelings. The underlying need for connection can be addressed by demonstrating empathy, as fake sobbing is typically an attempt to get closer to us.
• “What if the behavior is bad?” It’s critical to understand the difference between accepting action and accepting emotions. It is possible to respect a child’s emotions without endorsing bad conduct. Restricting conduct while acknowledging feelings teaches kids how to express themselves in healthy ways. It’s critical to distinguish between the child’s conduct and value, making sure they know that although certain actions are wrong, their emotions are always real.
• “If I don’t discipline them, won’t I be supporting bad behavior?” Just emotions aren’t always terrible. By expressing your child’s sentiments, you are assisting them in developing self-control and an awareness of their emotions rather than encouraging inappropriate behavior.